They say “you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover,” because you just might be surprised by what’s inside. The content may readily defy observations and expectations in unanticipated ways. And the same, of course, can be said for people, especially those who exhibit traits or behavior that’s outside the mainstream.
As we approach the finish lines of our lives, we often take time to reflect on how we’ve spent the years of our existence. It’s a process that allows us to take stock of who we are and how we’ve lived, and it frequently provides a means to help us make decisions about any remaining unfinished business we may have. However, such soul-searching may also leave us with more questions than answers at a time when we need such clarity most, the alternative being pervasive indecisiveness that can be crippling.
When the slate gets involuntarily wiped clean, we generally have two choices available to us: (1) walking away and starting anew or (2) attempting to rebuild. Both options usually represent hard choices, not only because of the effort required, but also due to the emotional anguish we’re likely to face. Of those two choices, the restoration option can be particularly trying, given that, as we go through it, we’re constantly reminded of what we lost. However, there are also things to be gained, especially when it comes to the compassion, assistance and support we’re likely to receive from those who want to help.
Forgiveness is one of the most challenging but potentially rewarding exercises in which we can engage. Mustering up the courage and gumption to take on this task may be difficult, even anguishing. But, once we make our way through this potentially intimidating process, we often find ourselves feeling renewed, brimming with rejuvenated emotions and grace that we never knew we possessed. In that sense, then, it’s also a revelatory experience, one that can light the way to fulfilling new and satisfying accomplishments, achievements that might have always seemed out of reach.
We’ve all been taught the wisdom behind the notion of “honesty is the best policy.” It’s sound, solid guidance that’s nearly always appropriate (provided it’s not carried to an unhealthy extreme). But what about the opposite of this advice: Is there ever any benefit in a falsehood, the so-called “good lie?” At first glance, it might be easy to dismiss this idea out of hand, but what if something less than truthful is capable of imparting insight, inspiration or comfort to someone in distress? In cases like that, can it realistically be summarily rejected?
Memory is one of those phenomena that makes the human experience unique and captivating. It plays a central role in defining the character of that experience and, in turn, helps us to define our very own individual nature. It provides a sense of continuity and stability, an assumed, seeming knowledge of what constitutes our lives and existence. It fundamentally allows us to believe in what we know and to know what we believe. However, it also possesses an innate fragility, and, when memory – and the underlying beliefs that support it – begins to fail with age, we’re frequently left confused about the essence of our world.
At the risk of gross oversimplification, nearly all of the world’s residents can be divided into two camps – those who are only too willing to comply with society’s dictates to keep from rocking the boat and those who insist on being themselves, no matter what, even if that means ruffling some feathers and flaunting their uncontainable individuality. Unfortunately, those who fall into the latter camp are often met with staunch opposition, frequently including efforts aimed at stifling their actions, beliefs and behavior, even for the slightest of deviations from conventional expectations.
When one lives in a small town, it’s not uncommon for everyone to seemingly know everybody else’s business, a circumstance that can be inconvenient, frustrating or annoying. But, worse than that, if one is somehow associated with an incident that’s tragic, scandalous or unspeakable, dealing with the fallout of such conditions (and the associated consequences) can be wholly intolerable. So how does one cope in scenarios like this?
There are things in life more important than money, but sometimes we lose sight of that, unwittingly allowing our perspectives to become seriously skewed. Unfortunately, this usually happens most often when family-related considerations are involved. And those flawed perceptions, in turn, can become even further distorted when money is tied up with those familial matters, particularly when inheritance concerns loom. Such is the case for a Chinese-Thai family facing the prospects of what will happen to the assets of its terminally ill matriarch.
Is love enough to sustain a relationship? It can certainly provide a powerful bond to keep partners together, but is that sufficient to maintain that connection when other issues arise (e.g., day-to-day life challenges, disagreements and disconnects about fundamental goals and aspirations, cohabitation conflicts, a growing lack of sexual intimacy, etc.)? These matters often come to a head when certain turning points in life are reached, such as health issues or retirement, especially when each partner holds different views about what that next stage of life is supposed to be all about. And, as is becoming increasingly apparent these days, these questions impact both traditional partnerships and same-sex couples. So what’s to be done?
